Often, we say that we undergo a unique experience. One that may change the course of our lives, shake our beliefs, rattle our conscience and flare a whole host of indescribable emotions in us.
Yet, this always seems to be observed retrospectively.
When it occurs, what is the experience truly about? You know that it is going to be unique, shivers shall pass down your spine as you walk away from it. Yet the moment is oft inexpressible in the present. What truly is the 'experience' of the experience itself?
We change our behaviour, our thoughts on incidence.
We change irreversibly.
On noting the reason, we realize it was due to us having experienced the moment. Now a memory of it remains. It is presumably difficult to feel the exact same emotions as you had at the incidence, yet they've left an adequately deep impact which prevents you from retracing your steps.
There may have been a surge of chemical reactions in your brain which seemed to have created a complex understanding of the situation and which in parallel, redefined your script forever.
Coincidently, this is also probably the reason why you felt the moment, but can't truly remember it.
Its there. Staring at you. In front of your face.
You understand what it says, but YOU.... CAN'T... SEE.... IT.
Its searching for these moments in our everyday lives which can send our lives into a focussed Brownian Motion ( pardon my Physics, its a little insane ). When in each day, through glaring mistakes, through daring acts, you grow phenomenally.
You know you grow.
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Monday, July 23, 2007
Shaken
Its been a long time since I'd felt socially responsible..
Retrospectively, it feels as if I'd been in a vacuum, and it felt really uncomfortable getting out of it.
Not that I wished to stay in..
More like I was scared of facing myself..
I was amazed seeing the face of persistence in adversity, hope in darkness
.. a story of brave India being carved.
Prayaas was started by IIM-A students and has successfully enrolled 17 kids into a mainstream public school this year.
To some its a statistic,
To some just another newspaper report
To some another social cause
To another, a world which can only go so far
To me, this was Light
The one that we sang hymns of in our elitist schools in the metros
A lotus in the marshes
It was a sight that uplifted my spirits
I reconciled to the blessedness that has been so generously imposed upon me
Smiles in tatters taught me many a lesson I've still not gathered
In a photoframe it sits in my mind.. and shall startle me and provoke me in the days to come
For there is a way we oft not travel
This is it
Retrospectively, it feels as if I'd been in a vacuum, and it felt really uncomfortable getting out of it.
Not that I wished to stay in..
More like I was scared of facing myself..
I was amazed seeing the face of persistence in adversity, hope in darkness
.. a story of brave India being carved.
Prayaas was started by IIM-A students and has successfully enrolled 17 kids into a mainstream public school this year.
To some its a statistic,
To some just another newspaper report
To some another social cause
To another, a world which can only go so far
To me, this was Light
The one that we sang hymns of in our elitist schools in the metros
A lotus in the marshes
It was a sight that uplifted my spirits
I reconciled to the blessedness that has been so generously imposed upon me
Smiles in tatters taught me many a lesson I've still not gathered
In a photoframe it sits in my mind.. and shall startle me and provoke me in the days to come
For there is a way we oft not travel
This is it
Sunday, July 22, 2007
A year ahead..
A year ahead of when I last wrote on this parchment..
Been a wakeful creature of procrastination since..
Been to many a place
Done a thing here and there
Graduated from a Fach to a Tuch
Pursued many an eccentric activity
Jumped my wildest expectation
Scrambled my sleep clock
Vegetated
..and obituarised my old self
Allo,
I'm back
..and I'm here
Been a wakeful creature of procrastination since..
Been to many a place
Done a thing here and there
Graduated from a Fach to a Tuch
Pursued many an eccentric activity
Jumped my wildest expectation
Scrambled my sleep clock
Vegetated
..and obituarised my old self
Allo,
I'm back
..and I'm here
Sunday, May 07, 2006
Exclusivity-et-responsibility: the burden of an elite B-school.
Last month, I 
became part of an elite club which many a mortal crave for. It was a happy moment, though I thought I was quite a Marxist who did not believe that I would like to be a member of a club which would have me as one.
The days that followed the announcement did not actually have the feeling sink in.
..until yesterday. While loitering around in my diary.. I churned up an internal dialogue on the many meanings of having reached the hallowed portals of India's best B-school. The most socially defining aspect that I unearthed is the exclusivity that being in a place like IIMA evolves. This exclusivity is often scary. It suddenly overbears you with immense responsibility. The need to contribute to the Indian economy in magnitudes that far outweighs others hits home.
On questioning the self as to what is it that propels us to go through this strenuous exercise and making it through, the first answer that comes to mind is the astronomical figures given by corporate houses to curdle the best milk to churn the cream. But that's extremely shallow for simple human intelligence to digest. In my view, its the exclusivity that envelopes you that is the main reason for the rat-race.
But the exclusivity has some extremely heavy baggage of responsibility. Being chosen itself necessarily tags it along. People look forth to you to lead them and grant you with ludicrous degrees of respect to enable you to carry out the function. But this is an avenue looked not by many. Somehow, we believe that the leaders are only those in the government, the politicians, the technocrats - somehow none of the those in business bear any responsibility except to make profits for their organizations.
A quick review of the recent people magazines may help me convince you otherwise. It's no coincidence that 8 of the top 10 in the 'High & Mighty' list-2006 of the India Today are businessmen. I feel little urge to research, review and google to find more evidence.
..as I head to the land which brands me with the 'A' factor, I somehow find myself thinking more than just plain green & multi-colored backs with faces of dead American presidents and Gandhi on them.
became part of an elite club which many a mortal crave for. It was a happy moment, though I thought I was quite a Marxist who did not believe that I would like to be a member of a club which would have me as one.The days that followed the announcement did not actually have the feeling sink in.
..until yesterday. While loitering around in my diary.. I churned up an internal dialogue on the many meanings of having reached the hallowed portals of India's best B-school. The most socially defining aspect that I unearthed is the exclusivity that being in a place like IIMA evolves. This exclusivity is often scary. It suddenly overbears you with immense responsibility. The need to contribute to the Indian economy in magnitudes that far outweighs others hits home.
On questioning the self as to what is it that propels us to go through this strenuous exercise and making it through, the first answer that comes to mind is the astronomical figures given by corporate houses to curdle the best milk to churn the cream. But that's extremely shallow for simple human intelligence to digest. In my view, its the exclusivity that envelopes you that is the main reason for the rat-race.
But the exclusivity has some extremely heavy baggage of responsibility. Being chosen itself necessarily tags it along. People look forth to you to lead them and grant you with ludicrous degrees of respect to enable you to carry out the function. But this is an avenue looked not by many. Somehow, we believe that the leaders are only those in the government, the politicians, the technocrats - somehow none of the those in business bear any responsibility except to make profits for their organizations.
A quick review of the recent people magazines may help me convince you otherwise. It's no coincidence that 8 of the top 10 in the 'High & Mighty' list-2006 of the India Today are businessmen. I feel little urge to research, review and google to find more evidence.
..as I head to the land which brands me with the 'A' factor, I somehow find myself thinking more than just plain green & multi-colored backs with faces of dead American presidents and Gandhi on them.
Friday, May 05, 2006
this is it.
It's been a long while since I've been thinking of publishing my own weblog ( though i've never posted comments in others) .
But I always felt out of time and place to do it.. somehow there was always something more important to do..
..that same somehow that 'somehow' allows me to do things I never wanted to.
But now that I'm going to WIMWI, I feel an illusory duty to write, because maybe 'somehow' , someone, somewhere might want to read what words go through my head.
However, my first post shall not be jeezing on the reasons of why I'm starting it, my roots, the roots of my actions or for that matter the roots of any indescribable cannonball flower tree..
This start was over in a moment.
...and that's all that there is to it.
Idhar is where you are right now.. and right now you are here...idhar for the uninitiated.
..and you've just finished reading my first post.
But I always felt out of time and place to do it.. somehow there was always something more important to do..
..that same somehow that 'somehow' allows me to do things I never wanted to.
But now that I'm going to WIMWI, I feel an illusory duty to write, because maybe 'somehow' , someone, somewhere might want to read what words go through my head.
However, my first post shall not be jeezing on the reasons of why I'm starting it, my roots, the roots of my actions or for that matter the roots of any indescribable cannonball flower tree..
This start was over in a moment.
...and that's all that there is to it.
Idhar is where you are right now.. and right now you are here...idhar for the uninitiated.
..and you've just finished reading my first post.
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